Emma-Bear

I'm not even sure where to start...back in 2003, my first "baby," Bailey, had JUST been diagnosed with a very aggressive lymphoma cancer.  She didn't have long to live.  I was devastated.  I didn't know where to turn.  What to do.  I certainly didn't want to think about my life without her.  Without our daily routine, playing ball, going on walks and runs, and hanging out ALL the time. She went everywhere with me.  She was awesome.  Everyone knew her, and loved her.  How would I cope without her?

After leaving the vet, I was on the way to my parent's house, just to find some comfort.  Bailey was still her happy self, but physically, she had lymphoma cancer eating away at her.  She had a huge tumor on her belly.  It was a matter of time.  On the way to my parents, at the Arboretum Shopping Center, there was a big, hand written sign:  "Full-Blooded Lab Pups for Sale." Was I ready for a puppy? I had to stop, just to "look." I didn't want to replace Bailey, but I thought, by getting another pup, Bailey would "live on" in her.  Bailey and I hopped out of the car and excitedly played with all the pups.  There was the sweetest little girl, and her mommy, who owned the momma.  The mom reminded me of Bailey.  Very gentile and sweet.  As we looked around, I knew I wanted a specific pup.  There was a connection between me, Bailey, and the little yellow female, with blue eyes and a pink nose.  Bailey picked her out.  How could I say no?   That day, Emma Mackenzie became a part of my family.

From that day on, life was certainly exciting.  Bailey, I'm convinced, lived a longer life because she wanted to make sure this new pup could fill her big paws.  Bailey lived another 6 months longer than the vet had guessed, and I attribute that to our sweet Emma.  I can remember LOTS of trouble Emma and her then boyfriend, Eddie, got into, over at Auntie Cheryl's house...getting food off counter tops, making confetti out of magazines and books, even playing tug-of-war with a ficus tree...inside the house!  She was going to be a handful, but I loved every second of her.  She has been PERFECT around our kids.  They would climb all over her, and she would barely move a muscle.  She protected them, and kept a close eye on them always.  ESPECIALLY on the boat...our little "lifeguard."  If you've been on the boat with her, you KNOW what I'm talking about!

Don't you hurt "MY" baby! lol. What a watchful eye!

A girl's best friend

SO gentile and patient

She was even in our wedding!

Emma would have been 10 on June 20th.  Brian and I were blindsided by dreadful news from the vet on Thursday afternoon.  We were in the process of getting ready for our beach trip, and Brian was on his way to pick Emma up to GO WITH US.  She LOVES the beach, and the lake.

When the vet called to give us the awaited blood results, he wasn't calling with good news.  Her levels had gotten worse.  He had to pick her up to go outside to potty.  Her breathing was labored.  She could barely lift her head.  She hadn't eaten in days.  This had all come on in about 48 hours.  She had renal failure.  Our worst nightmare.  Brian asked if we could take her to the beach, her favorite place in the world, for one last swim.  The vet felt she was not even going to make it through the weekend, and felt it was "time."  I had just pulled up at home when Brian called me with the news.  (Her vet is a good 40 minutes away, with no traffic).  I needed to be at the airport, to pick up our friends, in 2 hours.  My heart was broken.  In the midst of tears, panic, and sadness, I got Callie in the car, and headed to the vet to say our goodbyes.  What was Callie going to think about it?  How was I going to handle seeing her.  Watching her go.  Walking out of there knowing I'd never see her sweet face again...

She SMILED when Brian and I were there.  BIG smile.  A comforting smile.  She was telling us she would be okay.  The process was a very peaceful one, but I can't seem to get that last vision of her lying there, lifeless, out of my head. We had the sweetest pictures of Brian, me, Callie, and Emma right before we said goodbye, but I have evidently cleared them from the camera, by mistake.  I'm even more heartbroken, as we'll never have those precious pictures to see. We will miss her terribly, but we are glad she's no longer suffering.  We are sure Callie understands what has happened, and when it's brought up, Payton is quite sad.  She pretty much "gets" it now, and will tell you Emma is in heaven with Bailey, and Mommy's horse (yep, I had a horse when I was younger).  Callie is depressed, but we will, eventually, all be fine.  We've been giving Callie special attention and love.  Our friends and family have all been so gracious with cards, flowers, phone calls, and messages.  Thanks to each one of you.  Emma was a very gentile spirit, and will be dearly missed each day.  We are sure she's busy playing ball with Bailey, and her other doggie friends, and has a never-ending supply of rawhides, butt-scratches, runs in the snow, and swims in the ocean.

RIP EMMA MACKENZIE KUGLER...Our angel.  June 20, 2003-APRIL 4, 2013